It has been about three month I didn't write anything here. Perhaps , I have so much thing to do. So much thing to be settled. World matters. Sometimes , I even forgot about the afterlife matters. About faith, It's become fragile. Sometimes I forget what is the main purpose of my life in this world. Lillahi Taala.
Human, easily to forget. Sometimes, when I laugh too much I'm afraid that one day, I'll cry. I keep asking myself , do Allah pleased with me ? If I died tonight , today , right now , what will be my path ? Heaven or hell ? How about my duty ? As a daughter ? As a student ? As a friend ? As a ummah ? Did I already complete it ?
Sometimes , I reminiscing and remembered all of the trials and tribulations Allah brought me to - and got me through- 19 years of my life. It is painful. But then, I ruminated over how much Allah had actually blessed me. I began to realize how the tribulations I were going through were insignificant in comparison to those of others, and how Allah had allowed me to come closer to Him by placing them in my life. I then realized what an honour that was. And as these thoughts raced through my mind, I started to choke up. Have I really given my best ?
O Allah! I ask you to make me pleased with what You decreed for me return to good life after death, and I earnestly seek the pleasure of looking at Your Glorious Countenance and the craving to meet you, without distress or affliction or misguiding trial. I seek refuge in You from oppressing others or being oppressed, from doing wrong or suffering wrong, and from committing an error or a sin, which you will not forgive.
"Berjalanlah, selagi mampu. Walaupun dalam keadaan merangkak.
Kerana Dia pasti datang kepadaMu." - I love this quote. It's inspiring me.